Tuesday, 25 April 2017

My Violence Your Suffering, an excerpt from a one-act stage play by F.D. Stephens

[Media prompt] Catholic Church condemns Croatian play featuring Jesus Christ Muslim rape scene. ... Oliver Frljic's Our Violence and Your Violence [includes scenes where] Jesus rapes a Muslim woman wearing a hijab [and] a naked actress wearing a hijab pulls out a national flag from her vagina.
Excerpt from My Violence Your Suffering, a one-act stage play by F.D. Stephens. First performed at the Paedophile Playhouse, Mecca, Saudi Arabia, 1 April 2017. The play opened to wide critical acclaim, although a number of conservative imams condemned the portrayal of Muhammad.  

(Cast in order of appearance)

Muhammad Prophet: Mid-thirties. A Somalian criminal king pin

Maria: Nine-years-old. A pretty white girl. Kidnapped three days ago from a Houston suburb

Asli bint Khuwaylid: Mid-forties. A Somalian prostitute, thief and drug addict. First elected Somali politician to the Iowa House of Representatives. First wife of Muhammad Prophet

Madonna Alba: Mid-twenties. An upper middle class, pussy hat wearing, womyn’s rights activist heading up Chelsea’s “I’m With It” run for 2020. One of Muhammad’s many mistresses

Muhammad is a Muslim refugee from Somalia overseeing the largest and most powerful criminal enterprise in the northeast. His business interests include illegal drugs and underage prostitution. He has recently acquired a local media outlet and is being encouraged to run for the Iowa governorship on a Democrat ticket. He is rich and influential, and his wildly excessive lifestyle attracts a multitude of women, Muslim and otherwise. His first wife, Asli bint Khuwaylid, knows her best days are behind her, and comforts herself by laying the groundwork for the implementation of Sharia Law in Iowa, in which she is supported by Madonna Alba, an actress turned activist. Madonna is working behind the scenes with Chelsea to broaden the push for Sharia nationwide. We discover that Maria, a young girl in Muhammad’s company, was recently kidnapped from outside her home in a Houston suburb.

(The action takes place in one of the staterooms of a yacht moored off the island of Mo’orea in the South Pacific. Other guests on the luxury boat include President Barry Soetoro and his transgender wife, rock legend Bruce Hopstein, actor Tom Yanks, and Queen of the daytime couch, Windy Roper. Although none of these celebrities make an appearance, their presence is noted. The stateroom is ostentatiously appointed to resemble the Oval Office in the White House, complete with portraits of President Soetoro hanging on the wall. Along one wall is a row of bookshelves, which contain books by or about the President. On the reproduction of the Resolute desk sits a thin sheaf of papers, the President’s just completed memoirs. Muhammad Prophet is dressed in black, with an abundance of gold jewellery around his neck, wrists, waist and ankles. He wears gold rings on every finger. Madonna Alba is dressed in jeans and a white t-shirt that says “I’M WITH IT”. She is wearing a pink pussy hat. She speaks with a vocal fry. Asli bint Khuwaylid is wearing a burqa, but her morbid obesity is obvious. Maria is dressed only in a t-shirt emblazoned with the words “MY DADDY LOVES ME”.

As the curtain opens, Muhammad is seated at the Resolute desk. Maria is standing on the Resolute desk, facing Asli and Madonna, who are both seated on a couch stage left.)

Muhammad: I said, did you give the President a good time, bitch? (Picks up the first page of the manuscript in front of him. It is titled “God is Black”) I swear, if that man is black, Muhammed wasn’t a paedophile. (Laughs at his own joke. Asli and Madonna join in) Well? I’m talking to you, white bitch. Was the President happy?

Maria: (Tears run her face, streaking heavy makeup. Her whole body is trembling. She speaks so softly the audience cannot hear): I don’t know.

Asli: (Raises herself of the couch, with difficulty): Until we circumcise her, she won’t know how to please a man. (She walks over to the bookshelves) But then again, Barry’s not exactly a man, is he?

Madonna: And isn’t that the truth (laughs, takes off her pussy hat, arranges her hair, and replaces hat) Anyway, don’t worry, from what I could hear, he was enjoying himself like Bill at a rape.

Muhammad: Oh, well, in that case… (he puts back the page of the manuscript, squares it perfectly)

(The play has a running time of 26 minutes. A copy can be purchased online from the specialist bookstore, Arab Wit. All written requests for permission to produce the play should be made to the Government of Somalia, c/o Chelsea's campaign headquarters, the Dearbon Mosque.)

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