Wednesday, 12 April 2017

Armed and Dangerous

[Media prompt] British man charged after US gamer is shot by Swat police following hoax terrorism call.
Armed and Dangerous

David Jones put down his phone and sat thinking about what Michael has just told him. He thought about it for so long that his wife asked him about it. 

“Nothing important,” he said. 

His wife was disinclined to believe him, and more so when he said he had to duck out for an hour or so. 

“I’ll be back in time for dinner,” he said, jingling the car keys as he left. 

David drove to the train station, from where retrieved a phone he had secreted in one of the lockers months beforehand. He dialled the number of a terrorism hotline in the US state of Illinois. When the operator asked for his name, he told her it was Tyran Dobbs. Then he said, “I am armed with a gun and two bags of explosives. I have five hostages and unless $105,000 is delivered within 45 minutes in a red bag, I will kill everyone here.” The address he gave was for a bathhouse on North Halsted Street, Chicago. 


In Chicago, Dwight Rollins pulled on body armour and briefed his team en route. A veteran with two tours of Afghanistan under his belt, he was the most experienced man in the SWAT van. 

“Ten bucks says the most dangerous thing we find inside is Ralph’s boyfriend,” said Josh. 

Ralph Johnson was the newest member of a team forged in the crucible of Mayor Rahm Emanuel’s limp-wristed tag-teaming with BLM reds.

“He said he was meeting your wife there,” said Ralph. “She wanted a real man for once.”

Dwight smiled. The kid was going to turn out okay if he could give Josh McGuire as good as he got. 

“Okay, ladies,” said Dwight. “We’re here. See you safe on the other side.” 


Journalists at the New York Times and half a dozen other arse wipes of record sat on the story for two days before an original beta tester with sixty-three followers posted an intriguing picture on Gab. It lay unread for another thirty-six hours. And it might have scrolled into the graveyard of gabs, lost forever, had a sharp-eyed user not reposted it, thus enabling tens of millions to see President B.H. Obama being led naked and in handcuffs from one of Chicago’s finest gay establishments. Reports about the Russians quadrupled. But the story about Barack’s holiday in Polynesia fell apart. Another fake narrative upturned.

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